Quarantine Snacks for When There are No More Quarantine Snacks (& Other Weird Things to Eat)
Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I’m not talking about coronavirus. I’m talking about RUNNING OUT OF SNACKS.
At this time of not having full access to our usual un-ending supply of Vietnamese Spicy Dill Pickle Crunchy Vinegar Cotton Candy Sticks (grocery store snack aisles have gotten INSANE, amiright?), whether due to snack hoarders and empty shelves or Fear of Grocery Stores, I’m here to help you out a bit with some snack type treats you can make out of things that might already be in your kitchen…or that are readily found in most markets. Even during #coronavirusdays.
Of course, there are things that *I* think should be in everyone’s kitchens ALWAYS. Chocolate chips. This is not debatable. Saltines. Peanut (or other favorite nut) butter. Baking cocoa. Refrigerated corn tortillas.
As much as I love CHOCOLATE, I do find that most of my snack obsessions run to the salty/savory/crunchy side vs sugary/sweet, but I’ve tried to come up with both for all my snack lovers. Also, I am quite happy eating weird things. Like a bowl of Bisquik dough. Period. Or spoonfuls of sweetened condensed milk right out of the can. So, take my suggestions with a grain of salt.
Mmmmm, salt.
chocolate covered fritos
This is something my mother used to surprise me with sometimes when I’d come home from school. She had that whole “salty chocolate” thing down long before today’s “salted this,” “salted that” recipes. It could not be easier. Fritos (original, not “scoops,” “honey vinegar,” or “chili cheese”) and melted semi-sweet chocolate chips. Melt SSCC slowly over double boiler or in microwave (<- SO much easier, just check it often, like every 10 seconds). Dunk fritos in melted chocolate, layout on parchment or wax paper on a cookie sheet or wire cooling rack, put in fridge long enough to firm up. The most difficult thing is the dunking without also making Chocolate Covered Fingers. I have used scissor-style tweezers successfully. Enjoy!
Homemade tortilla chips
You’ll never run out of chips if you always keep a package of corn tortillas in the fridge. You can do them in a fryer if you have one but I just do them in a cast-iron skillet. Oil of choice (I’m sure there’s some particular oil that’s “best” for frying tortillas but I just use whatever’s in the pantry). I make a stack of about six tortillas on the cutting board and with the big knife cut them into eight “pie pieces” (aka tortilla chip shaped). Dump as many individual “raw chips” as will fit in your pan/fryer. Fry til just crispy. Ladle out with slotted spoon or “wire” ladle so as much oil drips off as possible. I lay them out on a brown paper grocery bag covered with paper towels (cuz this is how my mother did fried chicken). While they’re still hot and slightly moist from the oil, sprinkle with seasoning of choice: salt, chili powder, ranch dressing powder (more on this later), cinnamon and/or sugar. Start fresh batch. Fry all. Enjoy all.
Fake Egg Cream A La Laverne (or was it Shirley)
It’s interesting now that I’m writing all these out, how many of these ideas came from my mother. But she used to drink coke with just a little milk in it, so it was sort of like an egg cream, but not fizzy. And definitely no egg. It’s not that far off, really, from a root beer float: root beer and vanilla ice cream. I mean, vanilla ice cream is really just like frozen milk (more or less). Speaking of ice cream being like milk, you know what’s lovely? Putting a spoonful or two of vanilla ice cream in your coffee instead of milk. THAT’S a nice thing.
Raw Schmaw
I am not a doctor. And I probably do a lot of things that you shouldn’t do, and get away with it cuz I have a concrete stomach and a high tolerance for everything, but *I* have no problem with eating things raw (by things, I mean yummy sweet baked good type things, not hamburger), like brownie dough, cake batter, cookie dough, pizza dough, biscuit dough (you get the idea). Obviously, if you have a box of brownie mix, by all means, make the brownies if you must. But it’s so much faster to just make the batter and enjoy that! AND, you can just put water in the dry mix if you’re not going to bake them – cuz you don’t need the eggs for…well, whatever eggs do in baked goods.
RANCH POPCORN
Many years ago the movie theaters went through a period where they had little shakers of flavorings to shake on your popcorn. It was delightful. I don’t know if they still do that, but…I refuse to let the trend die. And a yummy savory snack is popcorn (with melted butter, duh) with Ranch powder. You know how you can buy the little packets to make ranch dressing at home? Well, you can also buy a big ‘ol shaker jar. It’s much more economical that way and lasts a really long time. I use this on other things, too…roast chicken, mixed in mayonnaise to go on turkey or roast beef sandwiches, you could sprinkle it on a baked potato or scrambled eggs…I suppose you could even make salad dressing with it!
soy sauce popcorn
I cannot personally attest to this one. But in a book I read a little while back, one of the characters mentioned soy sauce-flavored popcorn as being The Best Snack Food Ever and at first I was like, ew, liquids in popcorn? But…melted butter?? Liquid. And I LIVE for soy sauce. When I couldn’t find soy sauce at the market for a couple weeks that was a real problem for me cuz I marinate everything in soy sauce. So I have not tried it yet, but it does sound kind of amazing.
chocolate frosting
Another why go to all the trouble of making the whole thing when it’s just as lovely eaten out of a bowl snack when you just gotta have something sweet snack. I feel like when I was a kid I had a little book of Peanuts (the comic strip not the, well, peanut) recipes for kids from Scholastic Book Club. I’m telling ya, Lucy invented the hand pie. Anyway, they had a super simple frosting recipe. I no longer have the book and I certainly didn’t write it down so it’s just from memory and there are no actual measurements you just fiddle as you go. But it’s basically confectioner’s sugar, a little milk (or water if there’s no milk), and baking cocoa. Mix. If you want to be fancy add a couple drops of vanilla flavoring. I might have added the baking cocoa myself (I’m a baking GENIUS). But you can add ingredients just by the spoonful so you make just enough for a tiny snack, you don’t have to make enough to cover a cake.
peanut butter cups
Okay, this one does require a slightly specialized item – little paper candy cups (they look like tiny muffin/cupcake cups – is that what they’re called? Cups? That sounds odd.). So, the next time you’re at the market grab a pack to save for a rainy day. Or global pandemic.
These faux “reeses peanut butter cups” could not be easier. Drop some semisweet chocolate chips (enough to cover the bottom and then some) into the bottom of one of the little candy cups. Plop in a dollop of your favorite peanut butter (I prefer chunky), and drop a couple more chocolate chips on top of the peanut butter. Make one, two, or a whole plateful at a time. Put in microwave. You know your microwave better than I (oh, and definitely use PAPER candy cups for this, not those foil ones!) so you be the judge of how long to put them in for. Better to do short bursts of time (like 10-20 seconds at a time) than a minute or longer. The chocolate will melt and sort of morph around the peanut butter, encasing it within – just like a Reeses cup! It’s like magic. Chocolately peanut butter magic. Oh yeah, let them cool/harden after taking them out of the microwave. You can stick them in the fridge for a few to speed things along.
If you were really hungry you’d eat some…
When I was young and would whine to my mother I’m hungryyyyy there’s nothing to eaaaaaaatttt, she would respond “If you were really hungry you’d eat crackers with butter.” I refused and either returned to my starvation diet or found something, anything, better than crackers and butter. But you know what? Now I love saltines and butter! But I’ve upped it a bit – saltines with butter (well, Earth Balance, for the perfect spreading experience) and honey! You get a slightly salty crunch with the cracker, the smooth creaminess of the butter, and the sticky sweetness of the honey. It’s lovely.
Okay! Those are some of the easy things I make when there’s “nothing to eat” and I still want a snack or something sweet. I will NOT be sharing the infamous “cheesy fudge” recipe of the early 2000s. Iris might remember what I’m talking about. Google “Paula Deen Velveeta Fudge” if you must, but you didn’t hear that from me.
What do you eat when there’s “nothing to eat”??
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Cheryl
Fresh white buttered bread with vegemite (I am an Aussie) or cold buttered toast with vegemite when the cupboard is bare, or tomato and cheese on saltines, or whatever I can find. I really enjoyed reading all your snack ideas, thank you!
bettyewp
Have never had vegemite. I’ve heard you either love it or hate it. What IS it, exactly? In spite of the name (vege), for some reason I picture it as an EXTREMELY salty meat paste.
Judi
Never had Vegemite, but it looks like a thick bouillon paste to me. Interested to find out what it actually is.
bettyewp
Yes! Thick bouillon paste! That’s a perfect description!
Cheryl
Vegemite is a salty yeast extract from barley and youre right it is definitely an acquired taste. Just a smear spread on bread or toast is enough for me. It has vitamins B1, 2, 3 and folate in it too.
bettyewp
I think it might actually be in the “international” aisle at my market but I want to taste it before I buy a whole jar!
Judi
Saltines, especially the darker ones, are AWESOME with salted butter.
This “quarantine” is wreaking havoc on my eating patterns and choices. Most days it’s coffee and maybe a cookie for breakfast then nothing at all (because I’m not hungry or thinking of food) until dinner time. Then it is a whacked out grab bag of what will make it to the table. Tonight I had three corn on the cobs while yesterday I made a full Thanksgiving dinner. Go figure. At midnight tonight, I made a tray of blueberry muffins.
Stay well.
bettyewp
DARKER SALTINES? What is THAT? Is that a whole sub-species of saltines, or…just a randomized percentage of crackers are darker? I don’t think I’ve ever noticed a darker Saltine.
YESTERDAY YOU MADE A FULL THANKSGIVING DINNER?? I don’t think I’ve made a full Thanksgiving dinner in 28 years…let alone on a random Wednesday in May! Wow!
Judi
Sometimes – rarely – you come across a sleeve that has some pretty well done crackers and I feel like I’ve hit the jackpot. Sadly, they only seem to be darker on one side.
I got a free turkey for spending X number of dollars at ShopRite, so I threw it in the oven. I did cheat and do StoveTop stuffing, and to be totally truthful, I threw a few “steam in bag” veggies into the microwave – because I do like them. Skipped the mashed potatoes because the stuffing was enough of a starch, as were biscuits. But the gravy was 100% homemade.
bettyewp
Mmmm. I love real stuffing. But I actually also like Stove Top. Oh man, biscuits and gravy…and a hot open-faced turkey sandwich, mmmm.
Anonymous
Wow, I have missed so many chapters in your cooking book! What about the Duncan Hines chocolate cake boxes in the garage? You skipped that whole episode. Amazing what we put in our bodies and still live!
bettyewp
Ooh, you’re so sneaky today, Sister, coming in under a different account! Yeah, I somehow didn’t think of the Duncan Hines cake mixes when I was writing this post. OR the Nestle Quick Cabinet Door Game. There may have to be a Part 2: Weird Foods I Have Known.
And I think it’s GOOD for your body to eat a bunch of weird things at a young age – raw dough, cake mixes, etc., it builds up your tolerance to things so you’ll never be one of those people with a “delicate stomach.”
Karen
WHAT??? Last week I opened a can of Betty Crocker frosting I found way in the back of the pantry that had never beckoned me before. I told myself I could have three heaping teaspoons and then I had to throw the rest away. The third teaspoon was too sweet and I tossed it away quickly before I could reconsider. Who knew it was a thing?!?! I shoulda saved it for a dip for my balsamic vinegar kettle chips. My husband asked why I was throwing it away and I said I’d discovered it was expired. HA! I’m definitely running with the ranch popcorn seasoning and he is going to love the soy sauce version. HA! Life is just getting better and better! (I looked up the Paula Deen Velveeta Fudge – oh my Gosh! Blot the top to mop up the extra butter!??)
bettyewp
YOU THREW OUT A CAN OF FROSTING?????
I have no words.
Okay, I have a couple words. Canned frosting is a good thing to keep on hand. BECAUSE it’s so super sweet you can only eat 2-3 spoonfuls at a time. That was the same with the cheesy fudge. It was SO (weirdly) rich you only WANTED one tiny little cube of it each day…so it lasted for AGES and it totally satisfied my sweet cravings. And yep, top blotting is a thing 🙂
Rhonda
Oh my gosh! I had totally forgotten about Saltines with butter!!! You have so many wonderful ideas that I’m dying to try right now! The popcorn with ranch dressing! Yum! Also, popcorn (can you ever go wrong with popcorn?) with butter (of course, ALWAYS!) and hot sauce—any kind you like, for that zingy spicy flavor! One of my favorite sweet snacks is a date stuffed with a walnut…tastes just like my great grandmother’s awesome date rolled cookies, without all the work!!!! Happy snacking!!!!
bettyewp
Ooh, hot sauce. Hot sauce with HONEY! ha ha ha ha. I am the QUEEN of Taking Things One Step Further.
Marian
That was a fun read! I love it that your mother made all those creative snacks for you. It broadened your palate! I also wonder if she was pregnant when she came up with some of those (chocolate fritos)…or maybe it was a 60’s thing. I mean, ambrosia and waldorf salad were all the rage, so maybe she got inspiration from new combinations with new snack foods.
I alternate between having no snacks or crackers in the house or having them and eating too many. We (husband and I) don’t really understand the concept of “portion control.” I’ve read the definition but I think that running back and forth to the kitchen to refill my little cup of one portion multiple times is not what they meant.
We have been plowing through salsa and chips – fresh and from the jar. Until I stop buying them because by golly, we need to be healthier. For like 3 days.
Thanks to your sugar detox group, I have managed to mostly maintain that and I reach for salt to get my dopamine hit. I’m still getting salt, fat and calories so I don’t know what I exactly I’ve improved!
So in those 3 days of self-imposed snack deprivation, I will have the following:
-All the little leftover things in the fridge WITH CHEESE OR SALTED BUTTER and thin little bits of toast because I’ve also deprived of us crackers.
– Peanut butter straight out of the jar
– Bowl of cereal- cheerios or bran flakes (no fun but I can pat myself on the back because I didn’t eat butter and cheese)
– Chocolate mug cake when truly desperate.
Before I did the sugar detox, I rarely ran out of snacks but if I did, I’d make cinnamon toast. It’s practically cake….right?
bettyewp
I think chocolate-covered fritos came later in life for my mother. My sister, who is 14 years older than me, has no recollection of them in my mother’s cooking repertoire. Sometimes it feels like we had two different mothers.
Re THAT era, she DID do lime green jello w maraschino cherries, walnuts, and mini marshmallows for Thanksgiving. In a bundt pan so it popped out in a pretty ring shape.
Yeah, when I’m at the market I have all the self-control in the world. “Don’t get those chips/ice cream/bread/cookies,” but then I get home and feel so deprived and let-down because I have no chips/ice cream/bread/cookies!
Portion control HA HA HA HA HA. A bag of Doritos. That’s a portion. If I stop eating them a quarter bag shy of finishing the whole thing I congratulate myself for eating less than my full portion. Pint of ice cream? Portion.
My ex-husband used to open a bag of M&Ms, the small bag (!), eat a COUPLE, roll the open end of the bag down and put it in his bedside table drawer. That bag could lats for DAYS. I’m talking the little individual size bags. DAYS!
I was like why would you do that? His answer: so I’ll have more tomorrow. My philosophy: eat a bag today…and you can go buy ANOTHER bag tomorrow! Of course, he’s been slim all his life and I……have not. But…I’ve had a lot more enjoyment from M&Ms!
Peanut butter straight out of the jar is good when I’m feeling a little protein-low. If I want to amp it up (damn, I forgot this one in the blog post), I’ll drop a couple chocolate chips on the spoon on top of the peanut butter.
Nestle should make me their Ambassador.
Explain chocolate mug cake!
Karen P.
So, Hello Bettye (and Marian!),
I too did the sugar detox group and lost 10 pounds and got my FBS down 10%! And that was even with lots of interim cheating around the winter holidays, so pleased with that. Lately with the quarantine,however, I’ve not done well diet-wise. I hope to resume a healthier diet when more of my COVID angst lifts. I live in a state with a REALLY!!! strict governor (you could probably guess which one, ha!), so ready to be back to normal again.
Two yummy snacks I like:
One I made up which is healthy: Mix regular Cheerios with walnut pieces and munch as a snack. Amazingly tasty!
Unhealthy snack to die for: Google: Saltine Cracker Toffee recipe. Unbelieveably good. You need saltines, chocolate chips,butter, brown
sugar, and pecan pieces (pecan pieces are optional, but I wouldn’t leave out) Alternate name for this treat is Christmas Crack. 🙂
bettyewp
I LOVE Christmas Crack! I’ve never made it myself but someone always brings it to work right before we leave for Christmas break and YUM. It’s on my list of things to make while still staying home.
I have DEFINITELY found my way back to SERIOUS sugar and carb consumption during this time. We’re just home ALL. DAY. LONG. You need something to break it up…some little things to look forward to on a stressful workday. I know a better (?) person would say, “break up your day with jumping jacks!” or something else those people say. Remember back in the beginning of work from home when I was taking two STRETCHING breaks every day? HA HA HA. Those days are long gone. Work got busier and busier and everything had an IMMEDIATE DEADLINE and I couldn’t stick with any schedule of my own making. But I digress. And I’m confident I’ll get back on the rails once all this is over. This is (HOPEFULLY) a once in a lifetime situation. I feel like, do whatever you need to do to just keep going with maybe even a smile on your face.
Marceline Miller
Such a fabulous post!! All the great ideas…
and I’m with you in the raw (sweet) foods. For example, a pancake is not made properly unless some batter runs out when you stab it in the middle!
Then those bites get mixed up with the butter and syrup. (I can hear other readers saying “ewww” lol)
bettyewp
Oh! Don’t get me started on pancake batter! Just give me a straw and I’ll drink it right out of the bowl! LOVE pancake batter!
Marian
Chocolate mug cake is one portion of chocolate cake that you make in a mug in 1 minute in the microwave. Google it and find many variations but the basic recipe is:
Put directly into a large mug:
4 tablespoons all-purpose flour
2 tablespoon unsweetened cocoa powder
1/4 teaspoon baking powder
2 tablespoons granulated sugar
1/8 teaspoon salt
Mix dry ingredients. Then mix in:
5 tablespoons milk
2 tablespoon vegetable oil or melted butter
You can add chips, peanut butter, nuts…etc.
Put the mug in the microwave with a paper towel underneath for it to rise and spill over.
Microwave for 1 minute and see how it came out. Depending on your microwave, you may need more time so I do ten additional seconds, then another 5, etc.
I don’t bake often and I am very lazy. I keep a plastic box in my kitchen cabinet with all the small baking essentials…measuring cup, teaspoon/tablespoon thingy, extract, baking powder, baking soda, cupcake papers, four sifter, sugar, cocoa powder. I keep my flour in the fridge. When I bake something, I don’t have to open various cabinets and drawers – almost everything is in one place. So I can make a mug cake in 3 minutes and have almost nothing to clean up.
bettyewp
I’ve HEARD of mug cake but never knew what it was. And it’s a lovely personal-sized cake snack! I will definitely be doing this, thank you!