via GIPHY

I just have to have a little rant today…and this is not directed at any of you, my regular readers and friends…but there are have been more comments lately that I have not approved…and frankly, I’m weary of it.

I get that I share my pictures and stories of my life on a very public forum. But still, this is my home. I would not walk into someone else’s home and proceed to tell them how they should live their lives…how what they’re doing is wrong and how, instead, they should do what I say!

The comments are about my weight and my health. They make judgments based on my appearance and tell me I should be ashamed, I should not be giving advice (I don’t even know what advice they’re referring to), that I am going to suffer in my old age, and get this…I might even DIE. As if they’re NOT.

First, I barely take advice from people whose opinions I actually value…I certainly have Zero Interest in “advice” from a stranger. Second, if they knew anything at all about me, they would know the best way to get me to NOT go to a doctor/lose weight/change my evil ways. etc., is to insist that I DO it. Third, You Take Care of Your Own Life and I’ll Take Care of Mine.

I am not here offering medical office or weight loss tips. I am just here doing my thing. Saying EVEN FAT PEOPLE CAN ENJOY LIFE AND FASHION AND STYLE AND FUN. Yep, even us. Letting everyone know that whatever their body shape is, they can love themselves, they can dress however they choose and go and do whatever they want to. And I’m just here showing that that is possible.

YOU get to decide when and if you feel uncomfortable in your body, Not Anybody Else. And YOU get to choose if and when you decide to make a change. Last spring I was uncomfortable. I was frustrated at having a harder time finding clothes that I liked to fit. I wanted to be able to enjoy Sunday Funday without hip and heel pain. So I made some changes to my diet for awhile and made myself more comfortable. MY CHOICE. Not a stranger’s. Not a doctor’s. Not a health condition. I did what felt right to me, for me.

But the bigger point here is WHY DO PEOPLE THINK THEY HAVE THE RIGHT TO JUDGE ANYONE ELSE. And even as I was typing those words I could hear their voices in my head, “I’m not JUDGING, I’m just CONCERNED about you.” Save it. A) You are judging. I’m not the way you think I should be and you’re not only letting me know it, you’re telling me how to be the way you want me to be. B) I just don’t buy this “concern.” Why is your “concern” only for the shape of my body? Here’s a thought, try being concerned about my feelings! 

Now, don’t get me wrong, this kind of stuff doesn’t really affect me…not in the way they probably want it to. They’re not fat-shaming me, they’re not…knocking my confidence or self-love. I just find it so RUDE. I’m sitting here with my friends, talking about pants lengths, and they just come barging in, judging and insulting…and think that’s okay.

Well, not in My House.

Again, this is not directed at the vast majority of people who come here to read this blog. I get a very low percentage of these kinds of posts…but there have been more in the past few months than in the past few years (quarantine boredom?) and it’s been aggravating me.

That said, I get LOVELY emails from readers who never comment here on the blog, and I SO appreciate their kind words and thoughts and am glad they have enough confidence in me to ask their questions. I love getting those emails. 99% of the people I have engaged with through my blog/instagram, etc., have been delightful. It’s always that darn 1%, amiright?

So to YOU PEOPLE – and you know who you are – just keep moving. If I’m not for you, that’s fine, but just move along. No need to comment, critique, insult, or “express concern.”