I have bragged about making THE BEST coffee milkshake and I was actually surprised by how many people responded that they’d never HAD a coffee milkshake – even coffee LOVERS!

Way back when, when I first discovered my love of coffee (and that was not really until my late 20s when places like Dunkin Donuts and Barnes & Noble Cafe – which was sort of the precursor to Starbucks here on the east coast – anyway, when they started offering slushy coffee drinks. I literally remember the first time I had a Dunkin Coffee Coolata – I was driving my best friend back to Queens from my house out on Long Island. It was 4th of July evening, and all along the parkway we could see firework shows at all the big parks from Islip to Elmhurst, Queens. ANYWAY…before heading out on our long ride, we stopped at Dunkin and she was like YOU HAVE GOT TO TRY THIS. And I was hooked.) (that was a really long aside). All that to say I have a very nice memory of “my first time” 🙂

Once deciding I loved coffee flavor I set out to have ALL the coffee things. And there are WAY more products now than in the late 80s…now there are coffee candy, coffee liqueurs, coffee-flavored everything. Bakers have discovered the trick of adding a little black coffee or espresso to anything chocolate to intensify the flavor without adding sweetness (or is that just me? no, I think that’s a common-knowledge chocolate thing).

One thing I have thought about a LOT…is COFFEE PUDDING. Seriously. Think about the wonderfulness that is chocolate pudding…BUTTERSCOTCH PUDDING…just imagine a very lightly sweetened creamy COFFEE pudding oh my yes. I don’t think I’ve ever even seen a mocha pudding, which would be the obvious gateway pudding flavor to coffee. I have purchased unflavored gelatin…oh my gosh that could have been in my pantry for 10-20 years haha. But I’ve never really sat down to try and figure out how to get the coffee flavor in. It might be very simple (I’m not a pudding scientist) I just haven’t dedicated thinking time to it.

Just like the “lemon vanilla pie” I’ve wanted to make since the beginning of lockdown when all things seemed possible in the kitchen. My aunt and uncle used to make homemade vanilla ice cream with just the slightest hint of lemon; in fact, I never even realized about the lemon, I just knew there was something a little…”bright”? in the vanilla…only years later did someone tell me about the lemon and I was like OHHHHHHH. Anyway, they’d make this in an old-school hand-crank wooden ice cream maker with the salt and the hours and hours of waiting…and in the end, you’d have this tiny metal canister of summery goodness. And that had to be shared between like 9 of us! Needless to say, I was always left wanting more and I always looked forward to staying with them in the summer for their homemade ice cream (among other things, of course).

Oh, so, the pie. I started thinking, wouldn’t a PIE in that same…vanilla with a bit of icy citrussy bright flavor…be wonderful? Graham cracker crust. Like your typical “cream” or “custard” pie. My sister sent me some recipes but nothing seemed quite right…and I know me, I’m making ONE PIE. And if it’s not right, I’ll be on to the next quest (maybe coffee pudding). So I want the recipe to at least SEEM as close as possible.

But…COFFEE MILKSHAKE. Ha. Who doesn’t love a good milkshake? I’m not talking Mcdonald’s milkshakes here (come on people, you deserve better than that). A good milkshake is RICH, densely-flavored, not too thick – it needs to come up through the straw without a lot of effort – you know what I mean – but not thin like an egg-cream (mmmm, egg creammmm). Dense, not airy. Cold, a little icy, even. Baskin Robbins does a pretty nice coffee milkshake but they’re a fortune! I can get two BETTER milkshakes at home for what I’d spend for one milkshake at BR (hey, those are MY initials!). And it’s easy-peasy.

I’ve experimented a bit, but my current favorite combo has three ingredients:

1. Coffee. Black. Either an actual cup you made yourself or drove through DD for (who would do that?). OR – now you can find bottled cold brew coffee in a lot of stores. I currently have a Starbucks dark roast version. It lasts FOREVER in the fridge (even through 3-day power outages, but I am a freak of nature and can eat anything, I do not recommend you try it). But Traders has it, maybe regular grocery stores? But if you can’t find it, then a cup of your favorite coffee, black.

2. Coffee ice cream. My favorite is Haagen-Dazs Coffee. It’s slightly icy as opposed to super creamy, which I think makes a better milkshake. My second favorite is Talenti Dairy-Free Cold Brew Sorbetto, I know it sounds fancy, but I see it in all the markets I go to. This has a slightly different flavor than the Haagen-Dazs. The HD is more like a dark barely sweetened coffee, and the Talenti has a little creamier texture and tastes more “light and sweet.” They are both wonderful by the spoonful standing at the open freezer door 🙂 If that’s your thing.

3. Hershey’s Chocolate Syrup. Yep, just as a little coffee intensifies chocolate flavor, I think the little bit of sweet chocolate boosts the coffee flavor. Plus, this is the little bit of sweetness in the milkshake. You could use coffee-flavored syrup if you prefer, I know I have in the past, I just can’t really remember how I felt about it. I will experiment when I run out of the chocolate syrup.

Wait. It’s a MILKshake! Where’s the milk? SURPRISE. No milk. So this really could be a totally dairy-free treat if that’s what you’re looking for.

I have tried it with varying amounts of milk and nope. The blandness of the milk just weakens the strong coffee flavor. If you want milk, by all means, sigh, use some milk. But I don’t.

Here’s how I “measure.” I use an 8-oz glass (I drink out of 8-oz mason jars so if for some wild reason I was unable to finish I can put a lid on it and put it in the fridge). I pack it pretty tightly with the ice cream. A pint of ice cream makes a little more than two milkshakes of this size. It’s not SUPER-packed, cuz you need a little room for the coffee. Pack the glass with ice cream, then pour in enough coffee to just about reach the top. This is how you know how to make a milkshake to fit perfectly into the size glass you’re using. If you have a larger glass, just use the same system/proportions.

Dump it all into the blender. Squeeze in as much Hershey’s syrup as you want. Sweeter, less sweet, whatever. That’s up to you. Turn the blender on high. While it’s blending, rinse out the glass with cool water. A perfect milkshake deserves a pristine glass. If, as it’s blending, it seems too thick, drizzle in a tinch more coffee to thin it. When the consistency is to your liking, pour into clean glass.

I personally do not use a straw to drink a milkshake at home. It’s just one more thing to wash or throw out. But that’s just me.

OH – if you’re so inclined, you could turn this into a Boozy milkshake by replacing half the coffee with Bailey’s or Kahlua or your preferred “goes with coffee” liqueur. Now, personally, as much as I love the CONCEPT of the boozy milkshake, I have not found them to be as wonderful in reality as in my imagination. Like milk, the liqueur sort of dilutes the strength of the coffee flavor…and it’s hard to get enough alcohol into 8 ozs of coffee and ice cream to make it really give you any boozy effects. But that’s just me, YMMV. By all means, give it a try and report back!

Or you could add a teensy bit of flavored coffee creamer instead of the Hershey’s syrup, if that’s your jam. The possibilities are endless!

But if you’re a coffee-lover, please give this a try, let me know what you think. It’s literally, like a 3-minute process. You could have made like three of them in the time it took you to read this blogpost!!!

Enjoy!!!

PS: I made a short video (under 4 minutes) if interested…

How do y’all feel about whipped cream on top of a milkshake? I’m anti. Except in cute kawaii graphics. You?